K so I'm in a really pissy mood and I'll explain why...

So first of all, my great grandfather died the other day. So I'll admit I wasn't extremely close to him, I mean he lived in Florida so I would only see him every so often, but I was closer than most people are to their great grandparents (My sis was probably closer to him, see her journal for her input on it...). When I was told, I didn't cry and I wasn't too upset about it. I knew it was coming and, not to sound mean or anything, he should have died about a month or two ago. But the other day, seeing my great grandmother cry and my mom cry just hit me. I still haven't cried solely about it, but I've never seen my great grandmother cry. The wake is tomorrow and I don't know if I can handle it.

Which brings me to reason-I'm-pissed #2: My fucking back. So my back has been bothering me lately, since April, and I've had no idea why. I think it was from throwing shot put, but whatever. So I've been going to physical theropy, and had an x-ray that didn't show anything. Finally my physical theropist tells me to get an MRI. So I go to an orthopedic and get an MRI. Guess what? I have a bulging disc. You know what she tells me? No sports, no exersice for a month! Now I understand it's only for the better, but it's extremely frusturating. I'm going to be missing the first few weeks of training for ice hockey as well as the first week of on-ice practice. Since I've got schools hopefully looking at me for their ice hockey team, this is NOT the year I should be hurt for the season. Oh, and if my back doesn't get better, I'll need surgery. Then I can say good-bye to my hockey season...

Reason #3 why I'm pissed: My friends. Not really adding to the stress and depression I'm having right now, but it's annoying as hell. I don't know what it is, but their just getting on my nerves sooo much more than they used to. Especially two of my best friends, I never know if their mad at each other or not. I've never wanted to be away from my friends so much before, well at least these two. Two of my other best friends have also almost switch roles. We have been best friends since 7th grade. Last year, one of them was really closer to me, while the other one didn't seem to want anything to do with me. This year, it's the complete opposite and it really odd.

Thats it...wow this was really long....heh...sorry...